The untruths that keep you smaller and smaller

What are the untruths that keep you smaller and smaller?

We’re hardly 2 weeks into this month and the same thing is surfacing, each time with a different outlook, during #ConsciousInnovation conversations:

😵‍💫”If I show my zest and energy, people will believe I can’t behave with calm and confidence, they’ll think I am nervous. Whereas I am just an optimistic person.”

😵‍💫”If I am too detached, I assume people will think I don’t care. They might forget me!”

😵‍💫”If I look/am too detached, ‘I’ might even feel I care less!”

😵‍💫”My wide interests and ability to connect various themes and topics in one conversation is something that could be intimidating to people, and at the same time, they might feel I can’t focus. What’s next? Don’t want to be boxed into one thing. Ever. But am not making any progress professionally here, right?”

Does it sound familiar?

What do you think is going on here…

I have battled with these questions and assumptions myself.

In fact, the “Zest? vs Poise? vs Detachment?” spiral, is a regular feature for me.

There is a price to pay for not accepting who you really are, for not showing up with your unique identity and fulfilment, or for not challenging people who make you think you should be either one or another thing.

That price is sadness, a loss of perspective, some sort of guilt for not making most of what there is for fear of not being relevant or appropriate. Maybe lost opportunities. Loss of influence.

loss. of. genuine. influence.

And for the businesses you are working for (or applying to), well, for not taking you as you are, they’re losing out on your uniqueness, your capacity to bring people together, to connect the dots and pick up on signals, trends, risks, new sector perspectives;

They are losing out on your ability to represent others, to be a voice, attract new clients, bank on opportunities, and bring a return.

So when you wish you had more influence, it’s time to dare and explore your uniqueness, what the combination of your skills and preferred ways of being and working, looks and sounds like.

Because this is a pattern only you can offer.

What are your thoughts now?


The people I coach are mostly leaders who move or influence capital for social change. Through Conscious Innovation, they learn to refuel on inspiration, inner trust and drive. They learn to use their voice, their listening skills and empathy.

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